You can know anything. It's all there. You just have to find it.

-Neil Gaiman


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Charlie Sheen, you're my hero

Okay, so I confess, I've always been a fan of Charlie Sheen, ever since his appearance on Ferris Bueller's Day Off, which upon further reflection it seems he wasn't really acting at all, just playing himself.  I don't know why I'm a fan.  I loved Major League.  I liked Hot Shots, part deux.  I liked Two and a Half Men, one of the few TV shows I regularly watched.  Most of his movies, howeever, were pretty forgettable.  He was good looking, but I suppose years and years of hardcore partying take its toll.  He is funny; although I supposed mental illness shouldn't be made fun of.

But since he's perfectly fine making fun of his batshit crazy self, well, then, okay....

Remember Mad Libs?  I used to do these all the time - specifically trying to make them as filthy as possible, which wasn't hard to do.

I guess it didn't take someone long to do a Charlie Sheen mad lib.

Here's mine:

“I am on a drug. It’s called Melinda Braun. If you try it once, you will be excoriated. Your thumb will melt off, and your sister in law will poop over your flayed body … I’m tired of pretending like I’m not sexerific—a total freaking hairstylist from uranus. I’ve got wildebeest blood, hermes DNA! … They picked a fight with a unicorn. They’re trying to take all my buns and leave me with no means to fly my family. It’s not astrophysics! They owe me an apology while humping my elbow … I don’t think people are ready for the baboon I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of odorous love. I exposed toes to magic! Here’s your plasma test. Next one goes in your armpit!”

You, too, can do your own Charlie Sheen madlib.

Happy Wednesday!

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