Thanksgiving, cornhole, and useful mantras.

Actual Thanksgiving vacation dinner conversations:

Going around the table saying what we are thankful for, in no particular order.

"I'm thankful I have a job."
"I'm thankful we made it here."
"I'm thankful I have all my limbs and they still work."
"I'm thankful 2/3 of my family is here."
"I'm thankful I learned how to play cornhole."
"I'm thankful you went out and bought that toilet plunger."

We are nothing if not thorough.


About cornhole (it's a real game, perverts!) which is similar to bean bag toss, except the bags are filled with corn.  I don't know.  It's Texas.  And when I say it's a similar game, I mean it's the exact same thing.

I found out I stunk at cornhole.  Because it requires hand/eye coordination.  Everything I was throwing was bouncing off the board, and forget about hitting the cornhole, that was not happening.  My own mother was beating me at this game.  My mom was beating me at a sport!  A physical contest!  Needless to say, I died a little inside.

Then I recouped.

I drank a glass of wine.  Then another.

Then it was rematch time.

I still sucked.

Until I found my mantra.

And my mantra, not surprisingly, was one word.

And that word was stupid.

I'm sure none of you are surprised.

I launched my corn beanbag into the air and hissed, "This is so stuuuuuuuupid!"

Bullseye.  Cornhole.

I tried again.  "Stuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuupid!"

Cornhole.

I was on fire.

Every once in a while I would whisper, "Stuuuuuuuuuuuuuupid."

We destroyed them.  21-2.

Everyone needs a mantra.

Even if it's stupid.