Another genius from my hometown makes the news. A La Crosse delivery man defrauded the New York Times to the tune of $325,000. He did it using fake subscriptions; though no mention was made how long this went on for and what tipped off the brilliant minds at the NYTimes, or as my dad calls it, "that liberal rag piece of crap."
I bet one of the accountants got suspicious when he saw some of the subscription names. Seymour Butts, I.P. Daily, Yoo Flung Poo, Claude Bawls, Jack Schitt, and of course, Richard Stroker.
I'm sure when this guy gets out of jail, there will be no shortage of people happy to buy him a drink. My dad will probably send flowers. Something tasteful. French anemones and hydrangeas with a delicate spray of paper whites. You know, just because.